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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24558199">Does It Feel Good?</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/SquiggidWithShame/pseuds/SquiggidWithShame'>SquiggidWithShame</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Persona 3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Implied/Referenced Character Death, I’m going to hell, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Pedophilia, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Shotacon, You’re In This With Me</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 02:22:05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Underage</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,621</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24558199</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/SquiggidWithShame/pseuds/SquiggidWithShame</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Shinjiro wakes up, not only from the thunder outside, but also from a squeak and a shivering movement in his bed.</p><p>He blinks and then registers the small form in front of him, the floppy brown hair.</p><p>“Ken?”</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Amada Ken/Aragaki Shinjiro</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>27</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Does It Feel Good?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I don’t know how much ship content there is in the actual game, but if you watch the movie... you’ll understand my struggle.</p><p>Also, I used the way Ken refers to Shinji in, uh, Persona 3: Dancing in Moonlight, and Akihiko calls him “Ken” there, and I imagine Shinji would call him whatever his buddy Aki calls him whY DID I THINK SO MUCH ABOUT THIS SHAME FIC</p><p>Anyway. You’re in this with me now. We go down together.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It’s easy to fall asleep to the gentle pitter-patter of the rain outside. Ever since that awful day, there’s been an immutable ringing in Shinjiro’s ears, and all his muscles are sore from constant tension, a permanent scowl on his face. The rain soothes his nerves, drowns out the pain, and lets him finally find some sort of peace in his cursed life.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro wakes up, not only from the thunder outside, but also from a squeak and a shivering movement in his bed.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He blinks and then registers the small form in front of him, the floppy brown hair.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Ken?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ken pauses and then looks up at him, dark brown eyes swirling with fear.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“S-sorry, Shinjiro-san,” Ken whimpers, voice quivering. “It’s just... the storm...”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro turns his head to glance out the window. What used to be a gentle storm has turned into a torrential downpour, with heavy winds tearing at the trees.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Another crack of thunder bellows, and Ken squeaks again, once again burying into Shinjiro’s chest.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“K-Ken,” Shinjiro stutters, holding his arms away from the shivering boy.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He hasn’t shared a bed with someone in a long time, and he’s never shared one with someone so small before. The intimacy is unfamiliar, but not necessarily unwelcome.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Please,” Ken mumbles into his chest. “Just until the storm is over.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">This kid. Sometimes he tries so hard to act tough, but he’s still just a kid in the end. What was Shinjiro like when he was twelve? He couldn’t have been this much of a baby, could he have been?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Then again, Ken’s a much better kid than he was. Than he is.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Looking down at Ken’s body literally shaking in fear, Shinjiro thinks that maybe this is his chance to set things right, to atone for his sins and give comfort rather than taking it away, for once.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He’s not sure if he deserves it, but he wants to try.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Tentatively, he lowers his arm to rest on Ken’s shoulder.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It’s quiet. Besides the rumbling thunder and the stuttering beat in his chest, a stillness settles in the room.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">And then, with the smallest of movements, Ken wiggles his nose up to brush his lips against the base of Shinjiro’s neck.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Ken!” Shinjiro blurts out.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He lifts his arms again in shock, but this time, Ken pushes his arm all the way back and swings a leg around so that he’s sitting on Shinjiro’s lap.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’m sorry, Shinjiro-san, I just don’t know what to do,” Ken blabbers, looking just as upset as he was a moment ago about the thunder, but this time with a different kind of desperation in his eyes. “Lately, when I think about you, I...”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">His gaze falls. Shinjiro follows his line of sight to see...</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Oh.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It’s small, especially for someone as small as Ken is, but there’s definitely a bulge there in his sleep shorts.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro gulps. This is awkward. What’s he supposed to do here?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Squirming uncomfortably, Ken stammers, “And I was so close to you just now, I couldn’t help...”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The boy’s face is flushed red. There’s something cute about that, an innocence that Shinjiro lost a long time ago. Was it like this when he was twelve? Could he not control something like this?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It doesn’t matter. He needs to address the boy sitting on him first.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Ken, I...”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He tries placing a hand on Ken’s waist, but that‘s a mistake—at the touch, Ken breathes in a shivering gasp and squirms even more on top of him. Shinjiro watches, fascinated, at just how sensitive the boy is from one touch.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It’s out of an instinctual sort of curiosity that Shinjiro’s hand moves again—just slightly, just barely massaging up the side of the boy, just to see what kind of reaction he’ll elicit. And Ken doesn’t disappoint: his eyelids flutter shut, his teeth gnaw at his bottom lip, and his bulge underneath grows bigger.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">This is bad.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It’s been so long. It’s been so long since he’s shared a bed with someone. It’s been so long since he’s touched someone, and they’ve reacted like this, like they want more, like they can’t get enough. It’s been so long, and all the yearning goes straight between his legs.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ken feels it underneath him, and his eyes go wide. “Shinjiro-san... are you...?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Fuck, this is so bad.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He needs to shut this down right away. Clearing his throat, Shinjiro says, “Ken, we can’t do this.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Why not?” An innocent, genuine question.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Because...”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">There are so many reasons they can’t. Because of their age difference. Because Ken is so young. Because Shinjiro’s ugly past is tied up in Ken’s present.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro’s stuck on that last one. He still doesn’t have the courage to tell him.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Don’t you want it?” Ken asks, voice but a breath, moving his hips now purposefully against Shinjiro’s crotch. “I can tell you want it.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">This is bad, this is bad—</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">At Shinjiro’s silence and frozen expression, Ken starts to tear up. Bottom lip quivering, he asks, “Do you... not like me?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“No, I do, I...”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Fuck, there’s nothing he can say. Anything he says is a trap.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Please... I don’t know what to do...” Ken sounds so desperate as he begins rubbing the side of his hand against the bulge in his pants. “When I do this... it feels good.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro’s mouth goes dry at the sight. With his head tipped back slightly and his eyebrows knitted, stroking himself through cloth, Ken looks like he’s basking in pleasure, but he still looks so unsure, so lost, so scared.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“But sometimes, it goes away, and sometimes it doesn’t.” Ken’s voice is dripping with lust and desperation, high and breathy. “Please... I don’t know what to do.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The kid looks and sounds genuinely distressed as he touches himself through his shorts that are already starting to show a wet spot. His eyes are clouded in want and calling out to Shinjiro, begging.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He has to help the poor boy.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">With a quivering hand, Shinjiro moves away Ken’s hand and slips his sleep shorts down, just enough to free his dripping cock. When Shinjiro wraps a hand around the boy’s length, Ken gasps and falls forward, trying his best to steady himself with shaking hands against Shinjiro’s chest.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It doesn’t take long. Ken’s entire body is shivering as he moves against Shinjiro’s hand. When it hits him, Ken lets out a high whimper, so soft, so gentle, but so strained, and liquid spills over Shinjiro’s hand and onto his shirt.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">A part of Shinjiro feels so dirty, but a part of him feels proud to be able to make someone feel good, for a change, especially this boy in such dire need, especially this boy he’s wronged in the past.</span>
</p><p class="p1">Oh, god, he’s wronged him so badly.</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">They lie together for a second, both breathing heavily, both hearing Shinjiro’s erratic heart beat, and both feeling his stubborn hardness.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">And then, with a start, Ken gasps and leans back.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Why are you touching back there?” he asks, eyes wide with shock and confusion.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“What?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro blinks and then realizes, when Ken fell forward, in order to get a better grip on him, his other hand had reached behind and grabbed Ken’s ass. With his shorts and boxers off, Shinjiro’s fingers are dangerously close to Ken’s hole.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Oh, um, sorry,” Shinjiro says lamely.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Just as he’s about to move his hand away, Ken asks, “Does it feel good to be touched there, too?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Christ, this boy, this situation. What’s he supposed to do?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Swallowing hard, Shinjiro mumbles, “Yeah, it does.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Good like how it felt just now?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“It’s... different.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Can you show me?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Fuck.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">No, it’s OK. It’s fine. Shinjiro’s just showing Ken how to touch his own body. The boy’s distressed and curious, and Shinjiro’s just helping him out. It’s fine.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Angling his hand just slightly, Shinjiro wiggles a finger inside Ken’s tight hole, spreading Ken’s cheeks with the other hand. An uncomfortable expression passes over Ken’s face at the entrance.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“This... doesn’t feel good,” Ken confesses, biting his lip.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“No?” Shinjiro curls his finger. “How about now?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ken’s eyelids flutter and he drops his mouth open, gasping loudly. It’s such a cute sound, and it eggs Shinjiro on as he pushes his finger in deeper in the soft, wet hole, slowly moving his finger in and out.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“How does it feel now?” Shinjiro whispers, voice low.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ken can only whimper in response.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“What about now?” Shinjiro asks, retreating his finger for a second before entering again with two fingers this time.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">A violent shiver races down Ken’s spine, and he lets out a breathy moan. With half-lidded eyes, his hips start moving back against Shinjiro’s exploring fingers.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shit, that’s so hot. Why is that so hot?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ken’s spent cock is hard again.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro’s cock is so hard, it’s infuriating.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Y-yours...” Ken says between whimpers. “Yours is...”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro grits his teeth and curses under his breath.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You know... some people...” Shinjiro licks his lips. “Put this... in there...”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“What?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro adds another finger, now moving easily in and out of the stretched hole. On his lap, Ken writhes on top of him, right on top of his aching cock.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“But it’s... too big,” Ken whispers breathily.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You’d be surprised.” Shinjiro leans in a fraction, stretching his fingers. “I have three fingers in you right now.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Like a curious student, Ken pinches together three of his fingers and studies the shape, the thickness. It’s so cute. He’s so cute.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Does it feel good?” Ken asks, glancing up almost shyly at Shinjiro. His cheeks are flushed red. Adorable.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro nods. “Yeah.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“For who?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“For both.” </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Do you want to do it?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro can’t answer that question. He doesn’t trust himself to answer that question.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Do you?” he asks instead.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ken leans in closer, a new determination in his eyes. “If it’ll make you feel good, then I want to.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">God, he’s so fucked.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro retreats his fingers, causing Ken to whine in a mixture of disappointment and relief. With his heart pounding in his chest from yearning and trepidation, Shinjiro lifts the boy up off him to give himself just enough room to push down his sleep pants. Ken’s eyes go wide at Shinjiro’s thick length, taking it all in for the first time.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Hey, it’s OK,” Shinjiro reassures, stroking Ken’s hip. “If it hurts too much, we can stop.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Fear hits Ken’s eyes. “It’s going to hurt?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“At first, yeah,” Shinjiro says, nodding. “But it won’t hurt long, I swear.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ken still looks frightened, glancing down at Shinjiro’s engorged cock, but he gulps and nods.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro spits in his hand and glides it over his cock. The liquid is so thin and dries too quickly.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Shit, I wish...” No, it wouldn’t have made sense if he’d bought lube. He hadn’t been expecting this in the slightest.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Watching his hand, Ken suggests, “Why don’t I just...”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He shifts down on Shinjiro’s body and leans down, taking Shinjiro’s cock in his little mouth.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">A low groan escapes Shinjiro’s mouth. Ken looks up to check Shinjiro’s reaction, and seeing those wide, innocent eyes and that little mouth wrapped around his cock is too much.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Ken, you have to stop,” Shinjiro struggles to say.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ken pulls back, worry knitting his eyebrows. “Do you not like it?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“No, no, I like it too much.” Shinjiro beckons him closer with a hand. “Come here.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ken’s hips are back in Shinjiro’s hands. With shaking fingers, he guides Ken’s lower body down onto his wet, weeping cock.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The head of his cock pops into Ken’s stretched hole, and the boy yelps, shutting his eyes tight and clenching his fists on Shinjiro’s chest.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Shh, shh,” Shinjiro cooes, kneading Ken’s hips. “It’s OK.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“It—it hurts—”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I know, I’m sorry, but I promise it’ll feel better.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ken opens one eye, lips pursed. “Does it... feel good for you?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro can’t lie. He nods, not trusting himself to say more.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">A small smile quirks on Ken’s lips. It’s a little lopsided, a little hesitant, but a little confident. There’s something so sexy about it. </span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“It makes me happy to make you feel that way, Shinjiro-san,” Ken says.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">And then he willingly sinks himself down further on Shinjiro’s length. He’s shuddering and whimpering and gasping the whole way down, but he takes it all in, takes Shinjiro’s cock right to the hilt.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It feels so tight and hot all around Shinjiro’s cock. It feels so good, it’s dangerous.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Carefully, Shinjiro lifts Ken up and then sinks him back down, slowly, gently. Ken’s so small and light that it’s easy to move him up and down. Even if Shinjiro’s instincts are begging him to pound into the boy, he uses what little conscience he has at this point to take it slow and easy for the kid.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">And then it hits him—Ken’s eyes go wide, and he sucks in a loud gasp. Shinjiro can’t help feeling relieved, not only because Ken’s not in pain anymore, but also because Ken’s starting to move on his own accord, bouncing lightly against Shinjiro’s cock.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Ah, Shinjiro-san—!” Ken gasps.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Does it feel good?”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Ah!” Ken’s mouth drops open, and he can’t answer, just moves quicker on Shinjiro’s lap.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">There’s not much of a buildup: Ken’s inexperienced and excited body tenses around him, and he comes again with tears in his eyes. A part of Shinjiro is glad that Ken was able to come again so quickly, because he’s not sure how much he can hold back anymore. He grabs Ken’s hips tight and pounds into him, thrusting hard and coming hard with a low stuttering groan.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ken collapses on top of him with a whine. The realization of what he’s just done creeps up on Shinjiro, but he tries to push the guilt away. Instead, he focuses on Ken’s warm body on top of his, the boy’s light breaths against his chest.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It’s OK. He was able to make Ken feel good. He did a good thing. Right?</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Are you OK?” he asks, wondering how much he’s asking for Ken’s sake and how much he’s asking for his own.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah, but...” Ken squirms. “It‘s still...”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Ah, shit, sorry.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Embarrassed at the late realization, Shinjiro lifts Ken up and back so that his cock falls out of Ken’s hole.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ken whimpers. “It’s... it’s coming out.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“Yeah, yeah, one second.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro shuffles them around so that Ken’s on his stomach on the bed, and then he sits up. His shirt is already a mess, so he just takes it off and uses it to wipe down the smooth curves of Ken’s ass.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“I’m sorry,” Ken mumbles, “about your shirt.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro shakes his head. “It’s fine.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">There’s a sort of bleariness in Ken’s voice. Sure enough, as Shinjiro tosses the shirt away, Ken yawns.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">“You sleepy?” Shinjiro asks.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Ken’s eyes flutter closed. “Mmhmm.”</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">He really is adorable.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro can’t help the warm feeling of wanting to protect the boy, more so than ever before. Even with their previous history, they’ve connected in a different way now—in a more intimate, personal way.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">After giving Ken a small pat on the head, Shinjiro climbs in the bed next to him. Immediately, Ken snuggles up to his chest, and it doesn’t take long for his breathing to even out.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">The storm outside has finally quieted down.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">Shinjiro rests his mouth against the top of Ken’s head and strokes the boy’s back with his hand.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1">It’s OK. It’ll be OK. He won’t tell anyone what they did, and he doubts Ken will, either. It’ll be their secret, one he’ll take to his grave if he has to.</span>
</p><p class="p1">
  <span class="s1"> He closes his eyes and falls asleep.</span>
</p>
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